admin: Tay Sam Pharol
I created this page to avoid overbombarding users's blogspots with comments.
You can chat below.
This is specifically a second chat for more specific stuff. I may not create other channels for the foreseeable future.
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No problem.
ReplyDeleteTime for me to get ready for CE5 in the upcoming weeks or this winter. Things are aligning in my life now. I already have half of the amount saved up for a place to do protocol. Maybe I will finally get a temporary trip home in the galaxy. Maybe they will land. Maybe they won't outright do it at first. But ideally they should come here in some way. Who knows.
ReplyDeleteI will keep you all updated if I am authorized to do so in the future. It's time for me to focus on what matters most: family.
(just telling you there is some money talk ahead)
ReplyDeleteIt's already happening, Libra and whoever else is reading.
notes:
I'm on a path towards extreme change since 11/1 and synchronicities keep appearing like crazy since 3 to 4 days. It's almost out of control. I'm getting money out of unexpected sources: my own mother repaid me for the ankle braces I bought for my inward flexing feet, which tends to hurt when I walk a lot, and even the bank. I received, almost out of nowhere, 100$ from "credit memo" on an unexpected day recently, and this is before my "curatrice" (French word) even could send me support money for December which would also be 100$. I looked up what credit memo is, and it says it's when the bank owes you or gives you money. For something as vague as "credit memo", what if those are a part of the St Germain funds? And after I am cured of FND? And after my treatment team decided to wean me off custodianship? And after I met the CE5 person? Is this to compensate what my friend went through this month? Why is the timing so accurate? My bank already sent me exactly 100 when I opened my bank account because I have a Youth account with its benefits, so why would they send it a second time? They don't need to?? Also, when the "curatrice" sends me funds it doesn't say "credit memo" but something else related to the government of Quebec. I see no other way this can happen. It's what I see now: 100% chances of me fulfilling my missions! Hundreds everywhere!
The last time I received "St Germain funds" was in late 2020 when I got an "angel number" on the total of my SSDI check and I sensed it would happen the month prior. Later on, I told the channeler Lynne about this in a session and she intuited it was "given to me" by divine forces or whatever.
This is far better than the former state of feeling like nothing special happens or idleness, just the scope of having this sort of change in your life. My life does make sense again! If the LF had to give me funds for this for whatever motive, and THAT early, then you can guess why.
If you ever get St-Germain funds, chances are it will happen in a sort of way like this if you have a bank account. Either it will come through your disability check, through the bank like that or another way.
I am very close to energetically completing the first cycle of my incarnation and going to the next one.
As someone born in the early 2000's I see what you mean, and I wasn't exempt from that.
ReplyDeleteI hear what you're saying. Not everyone wants to continue doing "work". This is valid. I'm the opposite but within my own spiritual leanings. I need to be constantly on the go except when tired obviously, so I go walk all the time. I did say I am a nomad. I hate Earth slavery, however:
ReplyDelete- I will have to literally do everything put on my platter for my part in the collective improvement. Within reason. This is why I describe myself as a nexus.
- I will have to build as small organization, travel off and on Earth, heal people, hire ETs/humans and all that.
I'm ready to do all of that with ET and human help. But it is also, like you said, an internal calling, and not a forced or make-me-bend-to-someone-else's-will kind of dynamic. I'm still young, 22. I found my calling at 16. And also, this is why I absolutely require extraterrestrial assistance in such matters as by life agreement, because:
- I can't do all of this by myself (God forbid!)
- I do not have degrees or qualifications whatsoever (dropped out of high school) and do not necessarily want to spend more years studying and working in a crumbling system (God forbid that too!)
- It is an initiative to develop exorelations, it requires specialties and wisdom that ETs have and Earth humans usually don't
- I might require training off-planet.
- I possibly may do galactic social work, I mentioned that once.
As for how the responsibilities will be sorted and shared, I don't know, but I'd like to start with either of a few things, with reasonableness:
- Helping some adults/children rescued from the bases to reintegrate themselves into civilization after they are healed and stabilized
- Anything they deem will be needed for my work as the first step, but starting in small steps incrementally into greater duties.
Those are simply my hypotheses, wishes, and intuitions.
I did take a vow in 2019 or so to do my work and I can't break it; nor can my crew, even if I die, I will come back fast in a holographic avatar if that happens.
As Sharon told me before she left Earth when we spoke briefly about my wish to participate in her cancelled ET base project:
"You will have a lot of work to do!"
So yeah, they all know by now. We all have different end goals, and that's okay. I did put myself into the contract so I really have myself to blame, lol. But do I want to do all of that? Absolutely yes.
Wish I could get some answers. I heard they say hair acts like an antennae, that's the reason the women of the Vril Society in WW2 Germany had super long hair. Lost most of my hair by the time I was in my 20's, and I feel like I'm getting little to no answers or info.....just TINY snippets...like adjusting a broken antennae on an old TV, and SOMETIMES you'll get a good picture quality for a bit before it buggers up again.
DeleteThat was probably one of a few reasons the darkies did that to me, apart from wrecking my self-esteem.
I so need some DIRECT answers FROM the ET's....and to know that they did not abandon me, did not let me get thrown to the wolves and not care, ya know?
(tw: heavy topics)
ReplyDeletehttps://teisenvoymissions.blogspot.com/2024/11/control.html
Tomorrow is the day for me. 😊
ReplyDeleteI function as a "relay" between my ET famy (among others) and Earth.
ReplyDelete*family
ReplyDeleteDISCLAIMER:
ReplyDeletePlease form your own opinion about what I have to say next!
Despite the latest attacks on me (which included a PTSD activation), I was able to gather some information telepathically, but not everyone will like it!
Most people - including me - will not be contacted and extracted before the Event. This is mostly due to security reasons, basically for our own protection.
As for me, I have made a voluntary choice to step back from a potential early contact and postponed it to some point after the mass arrests of the cabal and the financial reset, when the situation will have been stabilized to a certain degree.
What has been also told to me is that I might be involved in operations that will take place much later (probably a few years) after the Event!
There were no alien sightings nor any ships seen in the last 3 days on my vacation. So yeah, while I am disappointed, I have no choice but to wait until the trigger.
DeleteI tried so no one else has to do it. If you're reading these blogs and wondering whether you will get contacted early, the answer is pretty much NO.
Delete@ Tay:
DeleteHm... it's disappointing indeed. Also because I'm basically dreaming of being picked up by kind aliens since about 2006, when I was in the middle of my teenage years! That's almost 20 years ago.
My real spiritual awakening began later in 2012, but I sensed early on that I was an alien that misses her alien companions. Intuitively, I knew about it, before I even began to hear about planetary liberation (which was around 2015).
Personally, I'm fine with taking risks....when one has nothing, one begins to no longer care about safety and willing to take risks, look at Mel Gibson's character, Riggs, from Lethal Weapon.
DeleteBeen wanting the aliens since the early 1990s.....30+ years ago.
My dad, when he was young, was living in Romania, during the communist regime. He made arrangements with his uncle, who was in the states, to get out of there. Dad actually had to sneak past the railroads and guard stations during the cover of night, to cross past the borders. IF he were to be caught, he'd either end up rotting in some hardcore prison, or gulag, or possibly even shot on sight.
Wish the Light Forces would realize it's getting to a point I'm set to do similar IF I need to, willing to sneak about, even if it involves having to sneak about the lion's den, as it were. Not to mention, I asked this many times....HOW is it that the CABAL...the gang of evil, greedy HUMANS, somehow managed to both survive the destruction of their dark, non human masters....but also keep the LIGHT FORCES confounded? Right now, it feels like that scene in "Return of the Jedi", where the Ewoks SOMEHOW were able to fight against Imperial forces, who had laser guns, mecha robots and air bikes, with mere bows, arrows and rocks.
@Sherman: I just tapped onto the field in a meditation. I was shown feline beings, they are willing to help. How ironic considering you said lion's den --- and yes this has to do with "sneaking out" as you say. I sent a signal to the Universe and God, begged them to help us. We should maybe even do a group meditation.
DeleteAlso, I did acknowledge some stuff:
1) We can find entrances to Inner Earth; especially since the network seems to be cleared of the c*bal.
2) There are groups and people that I asked the Universe to magnetize towards us for assistance. I sense some are like Grey Jedi morally. We have to look beyond this binary Light-Dark thinking.
Also I just posted this: https://teisenvoymissions.blogspot.com/2025/01/meditation-for-exiters.html
WHERE are they? I can't simply get up and go to a far place like Mt. Shasta, especially on a limited budget.
DeleteQui-Gon and Windu were 'gray jedi', so that's ok.
Anyhow, I just need ONE small space ship to land, maybe 20-30 minutes advanced notice, and some specified instructions, and NO cryptic word of tongue.
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ReplyDeleteIn times of wokeness, cancel culture and toxic feminism, we really need more people like the goddess Korone! I bet with you that she is a lightworker without being aware of it!
ReplyDeleteToo bad I don't have the right body... the toxic feminists and especially the TERFs would stand no chance against me!
DeleteIm not sure what's going on the last few days but it seems like everyone is getting upset about something.
ReplyDeleteI think it's all due the strong changes that are amplified by the Pluto energies.
DeleteIt's also rare that I get so furious like it happened the last 2 days. Good thing is that my life will drastically change next Monday - which allows me to get some rest of all this social media BS.
DeleteIt took me a long time to get out of long-term unemployment and to find something meaningful. It kinda sucks that everything - whatever you need - takes so long.
If my life would be more like it's supposed to be, I wouldn't be present on social media at all!
It's really crazy that nowadays, I need to escape from the Internet!
DeleteSorry that I threw such a tantrum recently, but I absolutely hate it to the core, when somebody is using gaslighting or another manipulation technique against me!
DeleteNo worries libra everyone has a freak out at times. Though I was like wtf did that other person say that caused you to respond like that.
DeleteMe not angry anymore, happy face now:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X-Rw3fJmE2Q
Sorry, but it's no wonder why I reacted so extremely strong, because psychological abuse is absolutely no joke. It can even lead to physical symptoms and can traumatize you for life!
ReplyDeleteI'm ready to forgive the manipulators, but please, they must stay away from me!
https://teisenvoymissions.blogspot.com/2024/12/naming-elephant-in-room.html
ReplyDeleteI think we are suffering more or less from what I would call "spiritual brain rot"! 😅
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ReplyDeleteBefore I will have no other choice but to vanish (due to a new occupation I will begin next Monday), I want to address a few things.
ReplyDeleteI think it should be obvious by now that the entire alternative media including the spiritual sector have become a giant mess and if you are not careful, all this chaos will swallow you. We are flooded with information like crazy.
Ask yourself:
How much of all the information really helps you?
Does all this knowledge make you happier?
Does it make you stronger?
How much does it help you when it comes to challenges of the daily life?
For me, it began to have the exact opposite effect at a certain point!
It feels like I learned something and nothing at the same time.
The entire chaos is also a reason why I'm so grateful for finding a meaningful occupation after 5+ years of unemployment! It really wasn't easy to manifest this. The good thing is also that I'm old enough to remember a world without Internet and smartphones.
Even though I never watched it, I think that the anime Serial Experiments Lain was some sort of warning:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HkpcYv9Qm5w
Time to resurface from the dirty rabbit hole and get clean!
I use the internet and my cellphone almost constantly, but I secretly hate doing so. I don't like our overreliance on "smart devices" at all. I've always been addicted to the internet, because I had nothing else interesting to do, and we are not sufficently telepathic to just google anything in the ethers. If we stop using the internet or reduce it to minimal usage only for very important stuff like relying messages to contacts or checking email, checking occasionally some news, etc. it might actually benefit our psionic growth. But again, the main issue is that we have literally nothing else to do in this imbalanced society and we base our need for stimulation via the internet and sometimes gaming. Anytime I log off for long enough I start experiencing withdrawal, obviously a wonderful weak point for the cosmic anomaly. I also want to keep contact with my family and friends, making it even more difficult since they may not have sufficient telepathic clarity if I try speaking to them mentally. My energetic blueprint also makes me extremely sensitive to feeling like I am merging with others I tap into, so I can't just do this all the time.
DeleteDetoxing leads to wondrous results, but I don't want to become orthorexic about it.
And the evident solution is: build more community resources! Bring people to go out!! If I had more "non-religious" community resources when younger that were adapted to my spiritual needs and leanings, a lot could have been avoided. But also, there's often risks involved, because I have been in a summer camp as a kid that had a very obvious cult mindset even though it was "just a game"; children as young as 5 years old were being mentally conditioned to hate. And also, it doesn't have to be just to make friends, simply going out and socializing can make a huge difference, even just for a few hours. The general ignorance and intolerance of some community organizatons can be bewildering.
DeleteI will have more than enough of this socializing very soon. There's a reason why I avoid other people like the plague. And let's say, if I would have lots of money and wouldn't need to look for a job, I would become even more a Hikikomori!
DeleteAnd no, I have to disagree with you:
DeleteSocializing can make it even worse. In most cases, I feel more lonely with the presence of other than being completely alone!
Same goes for the spiritual community:
Most of them actually don't even deserve my attention!
The only reason I gave some to them is because of professional reasons. I wouldn't even have created a Blogger account, it it wouldn't be for the sake of it!
Otherwise, it would be just normal social media and I would never have met all those people!
Sorry that I appear so cold, but right now, I am going through some depression and gender dysphoria.
DeleteI hope this new job libra goes well for you and gives you some positivity
DeleteAlso... and this is based on my own observations and findings...
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to digest for me why some folks keep repeating "victory of the light" of "victory of [whatever]" like crazy! It is - like it has been already mentioned, a circle jerk.
For those who don't understand:
A circle jerk is a group that consists of people who basically do nothing else but to keep acknowledging their own POVs while they ignore, ridicule or attack those with divergent POVs. I noticed that those circle jerks can be either positive or negative.
Regarding the victory, you might ask yourself the question:
Which victory?
Where is it, when people still have to fight for survival?
Where is it, when people die under inhuman conditions daily?
Which victory are we talking about, when even alternative media are heavily divided?
It's not so much the phrase "VOTL" that bothers me. For me, it's actually some kind of advertisement slogan (and it has it's existential right).
However, I get an eerie feeling, when I see people overdoing it with that!
Basically, the awakened community could be more or less divided into a "left wing" and "right wing".
Left (extremist) = doubters / doomers (haters)
Right (extremist) = followers (unconditional obedience)
As someone who has been studying psychology on her own and still does, it's sometimes shocking to see that some behavior goes in a direction that reminds me of totalitary systems.
I think that nobody can remain completely in the middle and therefore, an occasional sway to the one or the other side is absolutely normal. What I'm really concerned about are the extremes. I think it should be clear that no extreme form of society (e.g. national socialism, communism, anomie etc.) has a potential to last in long term.
Basically, we need some kind of balance in society.
However, the challenge already arises on the small scale (family, neighbors, work colleagues etc.). Another indisputable fact is that it's just a matter of time when earth's society will collapse completely - and it's definitely not getting better every day (despite the illusion of pseudo stability)!
Regarding "victory":
Even if it's 100% certain - the thing is that nobody can be kept on the hook forever - especially when you have been through so much hell; and we are still living under the same conditions, i.e.:
- we need money for survival
- the masses are asleep
- wars are still being waged
- our technological possibilities are still very limited
- the media are still flooding us with drama and bullshit etc.
Personally.... yeah, I believe in the good ending, but the psychological factor shouldn't be underestimated!
So, my advice would be:
Before you keep celebrating in advance, it would be more an act of common sense to wait until the victory actually arrives - which includes a visible, drastic and irreversible change of the entire society!
My advice for the "doomers" would be:
Stay away from alternative media or at least, reduce exposure. Take care of your own well-being as good as you can. No matter what happens in this world: Most is out of your control anyway and your well-being and that of your family should be a priority!
I have hope that 2025 will be the decisive year... but theoretically, the same status quo could go on for another 5 years or so and it wouldn't be too surprising when the entire liberation movement would be taken even less seriously.
So, let it happen first and then we will see!
Well said!
DeleteI too notice more and more extremes with there being less and less of a middle ground, whether it's left vs. right or (fill in the blank).
"Victory of the light" with no victory results in cognitive dissonance and loosh.
There's no victory until the alien ships land.
DeleteThere's still a little bit time left, before I have to disappear.
ReplyDeleteThe combination of various energetic factors are very real now - in a sense that a lot of trauma is coming to surface in my life right now. This leads inevitably to going through strong emotions; mostly it's anger and sorrow in my case.
Even though the trauma processing is uncomfortable, I feel better in the long run and I am glad that I am going through this now! After all, I wanted it to happen rather sooner than later. This trauma processing is also a necessary preparation for my physical First Contact later on and of course, my body transformation.
Once I am being transformed, the greatest part will be behind me, but I will still need some time to process. Also, there will be most likely still something to do for me later on earth - however, my current feeling says that I will not be involved in major things before 2030.
So, if the Event happens in 2025, there will be another 5-year phase of great healing for me and I definitely will need those years for recovery!
@Libra
DeleteSame, once I get can my transformation, I think 90% or more of my problems will be gone.
A little bit more info dropping / venting...
ReplyDeleteBasically, there are always the same reactions when it comes to those intel updates:
When the last update is a longer time ago, people become nervous and get hungry for new information. However, if a new update is coming out and they don't like it, they get furious. Some others are not even interested in what is being presented.
Furthermore, the fact that most people on alternative media are running around like headless chickens from one info source to another and back, is more than proof enough that they lack inner guidance (or are ignoring it; i.e.; being too much in their heads).
So, in any case, most folks are complaining anyway.
No matter how good the info, they won't be satisfied. Like drug addicts who constantly need their shots.
This is nothing new. They do it in 2024, they did it already in 2012 and the years in between. (I mention 2012 because that's the year I really began to get in touch with alternative media)
It cannot be said often enough to not let distract yourself from what is happening outside.
In times of TikTok and co., everything and everyone on media is fighting for every bit of your attention. It's like cheap prostitution.
You don't have to abandon the complete Internet however.
Out of experience, it can extremely helpful to distance yourself from ALL kinds of alternative info and use the Internet ONLY for positive stuff!
It is sad to see that the entire landscape of alternative media has become something like "pornography".
So, if you manage it for... let's say, just 2 or 3 days to get your head of all this circus, you will notice how much all of this has been messing with your mind all the time!
And before anyone is telling me that I am not better...
Thanks to covid, my life has tremendously changed since early 2020 and the effects of it are still present.
Even my social life was much better back and I had more contact with my family. However, the relationship between me and my acquaintances are by far not as intensive anymore... we have been drifting away from each other.
It's not the same anymore and I don't accept it that I have to be always the one who has to make the first step when it comes to joint undertakings.
Generally, I have the strong feeling that I have been just a means for the end for others. So in other words: If someone was interested in me, it was just because for their own profit. And it doesn't matter, if it was "Joe Sixpack" or a "lightworker". I'm able to socialize, but it's still very hard for me to expand my social network, because... I am still afraid that I will be abused as some sort of "commodity" again. Doesn't matter though, if we talk about romance, friendship or even something more superficial.
Basic interactions are fine.
But if we speak about more than that, I prefer to isolate myself as much as I can and basically, I don't trust humans anymore.
All this bloodletting and getting barely anything back, if at all.
It's enough!
Long story short:
DeleteI slipped into a deep hole in 2020 and it was a constant and hard fight to crawl out of this hole!
NEVER AGAIN!
Personal share:
ReplyDeletePeople can't just expect me to be a radiant beam of light in their dark catacombs all the time. Or to never complain. I have limits. That being said, I'm going to say it bluntly: I hate my life. Despite my efforts to live from a more well-balanced mindset and sort what isn't needed anymore, I cannot keep on flourishing in such dire Terran circmstances. I don't want to continue my "education" in an institute, since I burn out every single time and quit.
Even Gen Alpha is cancelling school, partly because old models don't work anymore, parents are burnt out, etc
And I refuse to further serve or support the old system.
Exactly my thoughts!
DeleteI used to be more lightful and I also was cheering up others... when I was stronger... I WAS... stronger!
The struggle is very well reflected in my financial situation right now:
Actually, I would need at least 100 bucks more per month to balance out things, but inflation is hitting hard!
And what I do next week, is a retraining in IT - but my income stays the same.
I'm a millenial, but I can confirm that this boomer dream of
"having fun in your 20s and 30s, working 40 years and then living from a good pension etc."...
...is... DEAD!
Unfortunately, I have depleted all my financial reserves and I still have to prepare for more additional payments that will come in the next months! So, I have to save money somehow from the little I have.
THIS is how I feel nowadays:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OV3MMNuICvM
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DeleteAnd it's even nothing new... the ancient stoics called it "memento mori" (translates to something like "remember that you will die").
DeleteIt is a lesson to accept the inevitable, those things that are out of control... if you manage to accept it, your life becomes more peaceful!
I don't know how much time I have to live in my current form, but I will try to enjoy it as much as I can.
I told myself one thing.
DeleteIf in 2 or so years I still don't get anything meaningful in my life out of this whole thing, I'll just escape to Mount Shasta to be honest. Alone. Yes, just 2 years, maybe even a bit before that threshold. Because I am soooo done. Mind you I am only 22. I've had enough and hate it here. I already feel 40. I don't care if I end up in a worse financial situation if I do this. I'll drop off Canadian disability benefits, just spend whatever I have on the traveling, and find a hospitable place/person and get on some kind of Medicaid thing. I wouldn't mind living in a tent or trailer being that close to the Agarthan entrance at this point. Then I'll just go out and look for an entry to inner Earth or find an ET.
I have done something similar before when I went to Timmins, Ontario, but I had to go back home quickly. I now know what precautions to take and how to proceed properly.
Living a "Bohemian" lifestyle sounds far better than anything else in 2025.
For people like you and I, reuniting with the ETs has "leaving everything behind" as a requirement. That's what I have been living. I have really no other choice.
I was actually writing something else, but I will keep it short and say that the following gives me peace:
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/shorts/oVL6-McVtpk
Well, I never was the one who traveled much (I never even left my country or my state).
DeleteI call myself a part-time Hikikomori, because most of the time, I don't leave my house. 90% of the days, I only do it, when it's necessary
@Tay Sam
DeleteImagine those of us who ARE 40. There's nothing for me on this rock, I was ALWAYS a fish out of water here. Going with the aliens is the ONLY thing giving me will to live, otherwise, as I said on Cobra's blog, I'd either be a drug addict, or just GONE otherwise.
And the ET's MUST pick me up, otherwise I'll perish on this rock, with a super traumatized, and feel like there is NO good in the universe, and EVERYONE needs to stay out of my way, for THEIR sakes.
This planetary liberation thing kinda reminds me of an old job I had from 2014 - 2019.
ReplyDeleteThings went down the creek, but I was able to brush it off for sometimer. But nothing improved, on the contrary. I was one of those not only complained, but also had some conversations with some people with responsibilities.
However: Everything just got worse and worse.
In summer 2019, I had finally enough and sent my letter of termination without batting an eye.
After recovering from my burnout, which took about 3.5 months, I realized that my decision was one of the best things I have ever done!
So, in some kind of way, I do the same with planetary liberation:
I quit.
And then, I will feel better.
Or is somebody expecting that I will work forever without receiving any "payment"?
Nahhhh! 😂
About 24 hours are remaining until my life will change - and I never have been more exited for Monday! 😂
Oh and by the way:
Somehow, this planetary liberation thing feels so goddamn rigged, that it must be really "pay to win"! 😂
My new occupation is pretty chill.
DeleteSo, most of the time, I do an online schooling for 8 hours a day and 5 times a week - plus some an internship later in 2025.
To be more exact, it's a so-called partial qualification in IT which is supposed to go until at least April 2025. After that, I might either get into a real job or I will expand the qualification.
In any case, I will be busy for quite some time and it will be extremely helpful for me to forget about all those online dramas (and I have also some other people around me - physically).
Nevertheless, I think I will still do a mediation once a day:
Deletehttps://starlight432.blogspot.com/2024/12/intense-personal-post-regarding-goddess.html
The link above inspired me to share a personal experience:
DeleteOne night, I had a nightmare in which an invisible claw was touching my left shoulder and it felt very REAL! Then, I woke up and I was afraid and I needed some time to calm down.
After I fell asleep again, I had a sexual encounter with a woman and I woke up again.
However, I felt very calm and content this time!
So, it must have been sexual healing (even if it was just on the astral plane)
What I can say is that I had a couple of sexual encounters in dreams already that felt very real - even though I am still a virgin IRL (and I never even did handholding!)
By "real" I mean something that feels as real as it can get in a dream. Of course, not that real we have in the physical state, but still very close.
Those experiences are undeniable proof for me that dreams can either drain or - in rarer cases - GIVE you energy!
So, the calming and nurturing effects of goddess energy are very real, but as you said before, those little and rare experiences are not enough!
@Libra
DeleteI sure could use some of those dreams, Libra. Here's hoping.
Even if I would be single... If I had the cute, sexy, feminine body I need, I could've received more goddess energy than I ever received from anybody the last 3 decades!
Delete1 or 2 days ago, I saw a cute girl that looked very much like Asuza Nakano from the anime K-ON! :
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1i7UMIYc5D_c8DzcmJncjKfOLk9K08JQ0/view?usp=drive_link
"I could be like her!", I thought... but this cuteness was too much for me in that moment and I decided to grab some booze!
@Libra
DeleteBeen there many times myself, Lib.
Let's hope the universe stops teasing us and to start HELPING us to GET like that.
DeleteT_T
DeleteSometimes I say:
Delete"If the soul is starving, the body will follow."
Well, my emotional body feels already anorexic - and it could manifest in the same way for the physical body!
Mine's like a holocausts concentration camp inmate.
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ReplyDeleteKindness Reveals Their True Nature, It’s the Ultimate Test:
ReplyDeletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Wj58nvoIMM
"They'll fool you a 100 times, if you let them.
And every time, you tell yourself: It's the last!
This time, they'll appreciate it!
This time, they'' change!
[...]
People don't change, unless they have to!"
This was by far the hardest lesson for me and it took me a very long time to learn it!
I'm watching those kind of videos for quite some time now.
DeleteIt's fascinating that an AI Joker feels more spiritual than anything else that has a label called "spiritual"!
If you ask me, it's just a proof that the universe has many different ways to talk to us.
(I'm trying to repost, since the other comment disappeared instanly after I posted it)
ReplyDeleteI'm on the best way to recover mentally:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHEz1B5Ifn4
So, I've found out that I can use the good brainrot to cancel out the bad brainrot.
My autistic brain really needs this after years of consuming "spiritual porn"! 😁
Long time ago, I was speaking of the curse of intelligence... and in the meanwhile, I have found the antidote:
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtW8NfPtC00
I found out I have secret haters on Discord, like that's even gonna stop me. 😂 I don't even need to know about their secret hate clubs.
ReplyDeleteSorry for bringing that up, I just needed to clarify that some attempts to crush or thwart me seem very pathetic now. Also, for these trolls, go back to your stupid 4chan activities, you're boring people. I have no time to invest my energy in your business.
Regarding my other, deleted comments:
ReplyDeleteI am totally fine, don't worry - it's just that I simply have no time anymore for all those chats, because my daily routine changed drastically.
Even though my new 9 to 5 occupation is not the worst, I still stand with what I said multiply times:
Once it's possible, I want to be extracted from this planet and physically transformed!
I'm flexible regarding this and it can basically happen almost at any point during my free time.
So, if we meet each other:
I'm ready to be picked up and to leave this society and my current identity behind!
Permanently!
PS to the lightforces:
DeleteI know that exfiltration before the Event is unlikely, but it's okay since my new established routine would most likely fill the entire year 2025 (and theoretically also 2026). However, I will reckon with the Event every day!
Good luck everyone next year!
"Preparedness" couldn't be more accurate now!
(Strange: Right in the moment I was trying to send this comment, my internet connection collapsed!)
Oh and regarding those emotional outbursts lately:
DeleteI let go off that as well (and deleted those other comments for that reason).
I'm so grateful to have a brand new routine, as it helps me to clear my mind! :D
Notes:
ReplyDeleteSInce I am nomadic by nature, I guess the best course for me would be to move every 2 to 3 years, or just have two places to live. Or have a sort of irregular "traveler" lifestyle. Right now, it's winter, so I don't like the idea of going outside that much if I remain within a local zone as I'm in Canada.
This is what would suit me after years of testing out how I feel about living anywhere on Earth.
DeleteShort update before I have to go to work in about 20 mins:
ReplyDeleteMy new occupation is really helping me to get my anchoring back to the physical reality and it's done via video conference. Even though most of them give me the impression of normies, it's by far more enriching than all those cowards that hide behind their keyboards - especially when we think about all the hypocrisy coming from so-called spiritual people (but that isn't nothing new for me since 2012).
Just came home from work and wanna post a quote:
ReplyDelete"You never see a hater doing better than you."
If my haters would do better than me, then they wouldn't be my haters, would they? 😁
I'm grateful for the lesson, but they shall stay in their cesspools!
Here's a kicker I want to drop:
ReplyDelete1 hour browsing in comments sections like The Portal blog is more exhausting for me than 8 hours of my current occupation!
This proves:
The energy of your surroundings is VERY IMPORTANT!
Yeah, the dark forces hang around there to influence/increase mayhem. It gets pretty toxic!
Delete@tel hin hi there that fb group is a scam. There's no appointments yet for medbed treatment as there not yet publicly introduced. https://youtube.com/@kerrie-annthornton?si=C-sXXPJwM7yhh7h0. This is skye prince actually but she uses her real name instead and you'll find her telegram group there. I understand it can get confusing and frustrating so much misinformation and scammers.
DeleteThanks for the info Scott.
DeleteNo problem
DeleteI hope we can get a full genetic sex change that way for those who seek it.
DeleteAnything is possible and I'd suggest watching some of her videos and reading anything given by her about the medbeds. I'd also encourage you to not give up hope in case the information provided doesn't resonate with you.
Deletehttps://web.archive.org/web/20231210004347/https://libraspacegirl.blogspot.com/2023/09/information-about-means-and-technology.html
DeleteNote:
DeleteApparently, I cannot send comments that contain HTML tags for hyperlinks, as it seems they are registered as spam.
Look at #1:
Delete"After the Event, she will return in a cloned body that will look exactly the same as her physical body looked in this lifetime."
So, that is an indicator that when comes to getting a new body, a medbed will NOT be used! How do you want to use physical medbeds for the dead anyway?
It will be rather some sort of technology that allows it to anchor your consciousness in a new, physical body (a process which is done automatically for people who incarnate into a baby's body).
And in an older interview I couldn't find right away, Cobra also said that your consciousness will be teleported into a new body.
DeleteKey word:
TELEPORTED
But of course, feel free what you want to believe or not, I don't care.
Once I have been transformed, I could tell you tell you later how it went, once I get the opportunity.
Delete@Libra
DeleteI would prefer to use med beds/machines. I want to have, as I mentioned in another blog, full say so over how this will go. I want to have full say so on all the details and features of said body as well, I don't want to leave anything to chance, and I really don't want to experience a death like experience to get what I want.
I also don't wanna find myself put into a body and not like it, you know? I mean I had stuff I ordered online end up gong to hell. Know what I am trying to say?
@ Sherman:
DeleteThis is exactly what I'm up to:
Getting counseling, planning every detail and then using a machine to transport my consciousness into the new clone body. So yes, I prefer to see my new product as well, before I take it.
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Delete"Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."
DeleteMatthew 7:6
I dunno, why it took so long for me to learn that lesson, but better late than never!
One thing that bothers me so much is, how come adults can't have a similar level of social immersion in games as children without being ridiculed?
ReplyDeleteWhen a child has an imaginary friend, it's normal.
When an adult does, it's labeled schizophrenia.
Jump rope if you must.
Build a snowcastle, a snowman.
Have snow fights.
Go LARPing.
Try out your local ice rink in the park during winter.
You don't have to do so in a park at all. Just in your home yard or in a field is fine.
Why doesn't anyone design some area reserved for adults to do these things? There are a few in the US: "adult playgrounds".
I want to re-experience the bliss of younger times.
It is key to my healing process. Especially post-contact.
I don't care. Be you.
Seriously. I'm almost pulling my hair out. 😅
I was thinking about something similar. It is possible to be child-like AND an adult at the same time! I would say, that it would be even healthy for you to be able to be... just yourself!
DeleteHowever:
We are supposed to be meat robots that have to function for a few decades until they are disposed.
But since I cannot be myself, I isolate myself voluntarily.
Oh, speaking of: Gotta go to work!
I hear you with the hair pulling 😂
ReplyDeletePulling mine over this ufo frenzy
Too much fear in the airwaves
These drones are mostly the dark ones to make it seems like we are being invaded so martial law can be activated. BLUEBEAM OPERATION!
To put booties on the ground and cause delays. They know once the Orange man is installed as Presy that the war officially begins. All legal and by law the dark establishment folds.
Retribution. Revenge. . Tik Tok. .
The 2nd week of my IT retraining is almost over and with every passed day, I realize how deeply my mind was entangled with the bullshit and distractions of social media. It feels kinda waking up from a dream and the memories of said dream are fading more and more.
ReplyDeleteMy personal road map is getting clearer day by day and even though I still have no future in the long term regarding my current form (and society form that will form apart anyway), I am nevertheless grateful for being where I am right now and grateful for the guidance I receive from the universe!
During the past 5 years of unemployment, I learned a very important lesson:
You must keep up a meaningful routine, no matter what!
Also an important thing about social interactions:
Keep them as real as possible!
I instantly feel the great differences between Internet and real life - and it feels terrifying! I say terrifying, because it's still incredible how much social media has messed with my mind!
What is also good:
DeleteI noticed that there's at least a certain degree of spiritual awakening within my online class (most of them are somewhere between 30 and 55). They don't appear like people who have digested hardcore intel, but are not fully asleep either - there was already talk of subjects like flat earth and the 7 hermetic principles.
So, in my opinion, there's no need anymore for starseeds / lightworkers to feel that extraordinary. In fact, starseeds should prepare themselves for working together with exactly this type of people who are already awakened to a degree.
Libra, really good point on starseeds. There need not be elitist, 'holier than thou' attitudes among starseeds.
Delete"And finally we have about 4 billion people who have the ability to think clearly at least to a degree, and they are the hope for humanity."
https://2012portal.blogspot.com/2023/09/situation-update-and-thailand-ascension.html
I feel guided to say that your progress and stance is what the light forces really look for.
I sense lately that certain repressed or ignored aspects of myself are surfacing.
ReplyDeleteI notice a lot how I want to foster or adopt, or do respite care for children, I think my path is steering a bit into a direction where I can welcome that in my life.
What 3 days of the winter solstice is it taught that these 3 days determine the quality of the next year?
ReplyDelete"Mystical traditions often emphasize the significance of the winter solstice as a time of transformation and renewal. One particular teaching involves the period surrounding the winter solstice, which some belief systems regard as crucial for determining the quality of the upcoming year. According to some esoteric traditions, particularly those found in certain hermetic and alchemical texts, the three days surrounding the winter solstice (December 21st, 22nd, and 23rd) are thought to be pivotal.
These days are seen as a time of reflection and intention-setting, where the energy of the solstice can be harnessed to shape the year ahead. The idea is that the thoughts, actions, and intentions set during this period have a profound impact on the individual's life trajectory for the following year."
(SK mentioned this in the past, but I couldn't remember exactly which 3 days it was, so I asked Copilot.)
Hope y'all are doing well.
ReplyDeleteWell, I made some significant improvements during the last 3 weeks by applying a crucial thing:
DeleteBeing very careful about what you deal with - be it people, media or consumables!
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DeleteFrom the latest Cobra update, quote:
ReplyDelete"One part of this Pleiadian fleet will start attempting strong healing sequences to many Lightworkers and Lightwarriors, healing their inner child, their connection with the soul star chakra, healing their wounded heart chakra and connection between their heart chakra and sexual energy."
See also:
http://2012portal.blogspot.com/2024/12/situation-update.html
This is not too surprising for me, as this paragraph confirms what I experienced in dreams already. So, in other words, there are positive experiences in dreams that have permanent effects on me in daily life. Cobra said that a huge breakthrough was made on December 21st. Well, I had an interesting dream on that day, but I am not going further into detail. Basically, what I want to say is that those posts by Cobra often confirm what I knew intuitively before.
However, it still takes a lot of time for me to heal - months and years.
This is also why restrict myself to the essential and only read the blog posts made by Cobra himself and not the comments below; to protect myself. Even though there are still good people around there, the place overall has become unbearable for me (that one bullying attack on me was just the cherry on top by the way).
Another great reason why I stay away from toxic people / places is simply to assure that my healing process can be done as peacefully as possible. I want to get done with it; I have to sooner or later and while I make more and more progress over time, it's still difficult for me to see anything good in other people.
By staying away from toxic places, I acquired more peace, but nevertheless, I am still going through a significant amount of unpleasant emotions; and of course, the majority of work is on me.
Regarding my mission, I am not a builder - I am a destroyer!
And one part of my mission was to crack up the belief systems of others. Yes, even those of so-called starseeds! And so it's no wonder, why some other people approached me with hatred (including passive-aggressiveness and manipulation).
However, my part has ended - the rest of the destruction (and balancing) will follow on its own.
When I was reading the latest Cobra article, I could only use about 20% of it and it's no wonder, because the same old things are repeating themselves over and over and over... (I speak in general, not just about that blog).
DeleteFortunately, I have a meaningful occupation that helps me to stay grounded in reality.
That boredom however, has also a good side:
DeleteIt drives me to change.
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ReplyDeleteI just got reminded of one of the reasons why I am struggling on the emotional level right now:
ReplyDeleteIt's about my body weight.
I used to weigh 130 kg and even though I lost some of that weight already, here's the thing:
You don't store only fat, but also emotions!
After all, food is always there to comfort you.
It does not judge.
It feels warm and cozy.
Food loves you unconditionally.
So, I wasn't just eating too much. I wasn't just eating unhealthy. I swallowed the emotions together with the food - literally.
If I release fat, I also release emotions, but it can get really problematic, if I release it too fast!
However, it's not the first time I lose weight (and gained it back).
So, whenever I gained weight again, I was resorting to the same coping mechanism: Comforting myself with food.
Since 2021, I am additionally struggling with gender dysphoria which also resulted in a lot of comfort eating as well.
And the thing is:
I want to lose weight, because I hate my male appearance, but very often I did all the comfort eating to numb the pain. As a result, I made no progress with weight loss which caused even more emotional pain and led to further weight gain.
At least, all the pain made me stronger in the end - but it's still not easy to continue walking.
The good thing however is that I know my body very well and thus, know exactly what to do to lose all that weight again!
One of my dreams is to reach the 70 kg range for the first time since I reached adulthood!
Of course, there are also physical reasons for becoming overweight, like simple sugar, processed food, all that artificial stuff etc.
DeleteBut in my case, the main hurdle is on the emotional plane.
Aside from overweight, a healthy diet can be also a good way for grounding!
DeleteSomething from a Telegram channel I would like to share, quote:
ReplyDelete"You have many selves, and all of them have their needs.
If you don't want to do the work you need to, it means a part of you wants to do something else.
Acknowledge it, reason with it, and take control of it.
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will rule your life."
See also:
https://t.me/transformcentre
"Many selves" is referring to all our soul parts that want to express themselves (and what can cause you serious issues, if they can't). I decided to do the work and yeah, it fucking sucks - but in long term, it brings me closer to what I really want to have in my life!
Another, personal thing regarding nutrition I would like to share:
ReplyDeleteIt seems that I have developed an intolerance towards vegetable oils to a certain degree.
So, one day, I ate some self-made potato salad while I was at somebody else's home. The salad had lots of mayonnaise in it which in turn had lots of rapeseed oil.
Guess what? A few hours later, I got diarrhea from it!
It's interesting, because long time ago, I already began to avoid vegetable oils instinctively! I still use some sun flower oil for cooking, but only rarely and in small amounts. Otherwise, I prefer to use butter.
I used to be vegan for 5 years and vegetarian for about 10 years, but I switched back to a carnivore diet that was caused by an iron deficiency. Generally, I tolerate food from animal sources much better.
Speaking of butter:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/dpXKn0PKjlU?si=sqlDjWXfOuR88bOu
I was just thinking how important food actually is (unless you're fasting).
DeleteA German proverb says:
"Food is holding body and soul together."
Just think of what would happen, if the food supply is being interrupted, if the stores would run out of items. Most people would go crazy after a few days (or even hours) - despite the fact that most could survive a long time without food!
Theoretically, my body could feed on its fat storages for a couple of months, but in reality, it's not so easy. Sure, if there would be nothing to eat, there would be no other option, but doing crash diets have a strong impact on your psyche.
Out of experience I can say that eating a small meal a day is better for me than eating nothing at all - I get tired and irritated, since my metabolism is slowing down very much (which also means slower fat burning)!
During and after WW2 for instance, people learned naturally to survive with having little or nothing to eat, but those times are long time over.
DeleteIn modern times, where we have actually an over-supply of food (and living in times food is being thrown away), most don't even know what real starvation is. If modern people have time to fight each other on social media over the most ridiculous things, I don't think that they have real problems with getting food on the table.
The good thing:
If you are going through a starvation phase (like I did for 2 weeks in November), you get also more efficient with consumption and you discover also new ways to prepare meals.
Very lately, I came up with a very simple idea:
Just using some oil and spice to create something you can put on your bread. Not the most delicious thing, but better than nothing.
It couldn't be more ironic:
Others are in VOTL mode and I... well, I am refining my emergency cuisine! 😁
Speaking of... yesterday, I watched a short video about water cake:
https://youtube.com/shorts/eT8JuYRkjJc?si=4u2fINeIMN-Htd0m
Speaking of emotions, I found myself often in situations in my life where I had been forced to withstand copious amounts of violence witnessed between others, and this disrupted the energetic field to the n-th degree. I had to go outside and open Light energy portals every single day during a certain period.
DeleteAlso,
My own mother is hesitant to see me live alone in an apartment, but guess what, I’m an adult and more stabilized and ready to do that now, so of course I won’t let her underestimate my abilities anymore like she always has.
I am really saddened to see how many souls inflexibly persevere on the “VOTL mode” you are speaking of. While it does provide some relief and hopium, I also feel that they just go in blindfolded, potentially enter into a sort of entrapment based spiritual technology and fail to see the point of this whole thing, they are so incapacitated by health problems and save-me mentality that they don’t see any point in trying, much to their disadvantage. Their distrust in the medical and social support systems also adds to that; or their unavailability where they may live. Every moment, you make a decision.
I’ll give you an example. One of my friends had to cut off from his disabled brother who was mooching off his inheritance.
COBRA can’t babysit you guys in the COBRA fandom, people should be encouraged to find their own answers and look after themselves. Otherwise, it’s a common fallacy. If people constantly nagged me with question after question that repeat the same theme, I would simply redirect them to what has already been answered. I would say, DO YOUR RESEARCH, folks. Stop bleeding COBRA dry. And quit throwing tantrums about how he is promulgating endless delays, he’s NOT IN CONTROL of his information. Don’t target the messenger.
You have a right to information but there’s an element that has to be earned, and I don’t know how to name it.
Same goes for a certain "medbed and RV" intel provider, speaking constantly in all caps when they provide intel. That stuff is beyond annoying.
@ Tay:
DeleteOh, hi there!
Well, why do you think I didn't even look after the comments for 3 weeks now? What people post there is always the same basically and has even become too harmful for me.
Over the past months, I got inspiration from all kinds of uplifting channels and they all have one thing in common:
They remind you of your own responsibility about how you react to what happens to you in life! It's nothing new though. The ancient teachings of stoicism were already addressing the exact same thing.
And yeah, Cobra is not a babysitter, nor is anybody else.
Anyway, it's very important to reduce stress coming from all those dramas:
https://starlight432.blogspot.com/2024/12/copilot-how-does-one-disconnect-from.html
I already managed to quit reading the comments and I believe that I can quit reading the entire blog altogether as well.
DeleteIt's always the same kind of content anyway and the only update I actually need is the Event itself.
I don't even read the blog's comment section either. It just doesn't interest me, I have other things to do.
DeleteIf I would've known earlier that commenting on all those blogs is mostly a waste of time, then I probably wouldn't have started to comment at all.
DeleteBut it's okay; I learned from all those negative experiences.
It's funny how once on sebastian's blog I mentioned how a psychic medium I had asked something about said she thought cobra was more a disinformation person. U would've thought we were in star trek and it was red alert. I read and listen to like maybe 10 different channelers and I never take anything as gospel or cold hard truth as for all I know what might be true today won't apply tomorrow.
Delete@ Scott:
DeleteUsually, humans tend to black and white thinking - so, in such a case, it's either a gospel or disinformation for them. IMO, it's eerie to see people being on one of those extremes.
Like I said before, I could use about 20% of Cobra's latest article, but that's totally fine and basically, we know the essential things already.
What's even more important:
We still have a real life and to earn a living.
I remember another commenter on Cobra's blog who said something like:
"Okay, but excuse me now, I have to go to work and to earn money. Come back, if there's something important!"
I didn't even see that comment as something offensive; on the contrary. It's just what it is. Whenever a new update comes out, people get their little dopamine rush - if at all - and then, they get back to reality.
Chasing too much dopamine is one of the reasons why you get depressed.
DeleteSome pump their dopamine baseline so much to the moon that the new baseline (i.e., feeling normal) was once a state of bliss.
On the other hand:
What was once a normal state, is now a low point.
That's also a reason why so many folks love talking the talk without walking the walk:
DeleteThe mere imagination of something good is already triggering a dopamine release!
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ReplyDeleteLet's hope that 2025 will be the year in which the slave system will finally be transformed into something that has been announced eternities ago.
ReplyDeleteIf there's still nothing significant happening in 2025... then I don't care - actually, I shouldn't bother too much, since I have done what I could already.
I simply refuse to further sacrifice myself without getting what I need. After all, I am still dependent on the money system like everyone else and accordingly, I set my priorities and boundaries. I must - there's no other choice.
The less I care about all the liberation drama, the more peaceful my life becomes. I seize my right to be as happy as possible! Slavery or not.
I can't picture myself combining the words slavery and happiness.
Delete@ Sherman:
DeleteSure, I am not happy as a slave, but what the cabal wants, is that we put ourselves into self-imposed mind traps and weaken ourselves more than we already are.
So, I am not in the mood to be constantly reminded of what I cannot change. Also because I need my energy for other important things; more than ever before. I'm not a NEET anymore.
Stress as such cannot be avoided completely anyway - and that's exactly why I decided to choose that type of stress that gives me at least some benefits (e.g. weight loss and exercising).
Hope you understand what I mean.
Libra, yeah lately I've really been letting go of things I can't change. Otherwise it pretty much drives me insane. The only result from being upset and stressing over things that can't be changed is loosh generation. I found this out the hard way.
DeleteI asked Chat GPT:
Delete"Why is letting go so hard for us? Why is it so hard to let go of things or people that we actually know are not good for us?"
And it replied:
Letting go is difficult for many people, even when they know deep down that certain things or relationships are not good for them. This has to do with a variety of psychological, emotional and social factors:
1. Emotional attachment and habit:
Our brains are programmed to prefer stable, familiar patterns. When we are familiar with something - be it a relationship, a place or a behavior - an emotional attachment develops. These attachments are often deeply rooted, and letting go means giving up a familiar part of our identity and lifestyle. Even when these things are harmful to us, they feel safer and more comfortable than the unknown.
2. Fear of change and uncertainty:
Humans tend to fear change, especially when it is associated with uncertainty. Leaving a toxic relationship or giving up something that makes us unhappy means moving into an unknown future, which can cause anxiety. The idea of being alone or without our usual environment can make us feel insecure and hesitant to take the necessary step.
3. Self-esteem and guilt:
We often identify strongly with certain people or things in our lives. Letting go could bring up feelings of failure or that we did something “wrong.” In relationships, it can also bring up feelings of letting the other person down or hurting them, which come with feelings of guilt. This can emotionally block letting go.
4. Hope for change:
Especially in relationships - whether with a partner, friend, or family member - we tend to hold on to the hope that things will eventually change. We may think that the other person or situation will improve. This hope for change can keep us from letting go, even when we know rationally that the likelihood of improvement is slim.
5. Conditioning and previous experiences:
Our childhood and previous experiences strongly shape how we deal with loss and change. If we have not dealt well with loss or separation in the past or have had negative experiences with letting go, these experiences can increase our fear of similar experiences.
6. Fear of loneliness:
The loss of relationships or familiar things is often associated with loneliness and isolation. Especially in interpersonal relationships, we seek belonging and validation, and the thought of losing this can be very painful.
However, it is important to recognize that letting go often ultimately leads to liberation and makes room for positive change and personal growth. It can be helpful to give yourself time to deal with your own feelings, reflect, and, if necessary, seek outside support (e.g. through conversations or therapy) to facilitate the process of letting go.
end quote
Whenever I struggled with letting go, I see myself in the points #1, #4 and #6. Regarding social media, I used them as a substitute for social contacts without being really aware of it, during my time of long-term unemployment.
Libra, excellent!
DeleteIt's crazy that AI is more informative and supportive than most real people! 🤯
Speaking of spice:
ReplyDeleteIt seems that it's actually worth it to grind the whole grains on your own.
So, one day, I wanted to buy garlic powder, but I only got a garlic mill. Once I used it at home, I noticed that self-grounded garlic powder is much more intense than the ready to use powder! I guess, I will grind more stuff on my own, not only for a better taste, but I also think that the medical effects will be stronger as well!
In the company I am doing my online classes, I sometimes drink coffee from a machine that grinds coffee beans own its own and I can taste the difference as well!
Crappy new year!
ReplyDeleteOh, but don't worry:
We still can have a "happy new year", if the Event happens in 2025!
"There's no punchline...
... it's not a joke!"
Fun fact:
Delete2024 had 366 days.
2025 has only 365 days.
Thank god, that makes waiting a bit easier!
Jokes aside...
I'm working on cranking things up.
So, for instance, I want to lose about 40 - 50 kg (90 - 110 lbs) within the first half of 2025! That would be exactly the amount of weight I need to lose to get into an athletic shape!
While I have some dreams already about what I could do after this weight loss, one of my achievements for now is to reach the 4th floor without gasping for air (and my house has no elevator by the way)! 😁
Yeah, there are so many websites to hunt through to find information anymore. I love how AI gets right to it!
ReplyDeleteWith grinding, reminds me of the custom of keeping food fresh. There are cultures that never keep leftovers. There's definitely something to that, and to grinding it fresh.
Physicality is so interesting. So many unique compounds with so many unique frequencies! Excellent info on black cumin seed oil. 👍
With January 1st, 2025, a new generation of people is being born from now on:
ReplyDeleteGeneration Beta, the successors of generation Alpha (2013 - 2024).
So, there are 3 younger generations coming after mine now! It's astonishing... as a Millenial, I feel older than my boomer parents felt when they were my age!
Well, I was pondering about the future of my niece who is in 2nd grade elementary now. I would like to see her growing up in a free world, preferably before she hits puberty!
I don't want to see more teenagers and young adult mentally rot! 😡😢 But on the other hand, it gives me motivation to clench my butt cheeks a little bit longer!
I dunno, why some sites are confusing with the numbers, but I stick to Wikipedia as source:
Deletehttps://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/3e/Generation_timeline.svg/675px-Generation_timeline.svg.png
ATTENTION!
ReplyDeletePlease check SPAM FOLDER!
Blogger is flagging my already published comments as spam which results in messing up the comments section!
Thank you in advance!
I checked now.
DeleteThat happened a few times, some posts by folks on Cobra's blog appeared there, not many, mind you, but it did happen.
DeleteFor me, it's without a doubt that there's an algorithm working in the background that blacklists and shadow bans people like me in a certain kind of way.
ReplyDeleteIt's too bad that this happens, since I feel more comfortable in small groups - big groups are too overwhelming for me; they often get very chaotic and another disadvantage is that they often lead to social loafing.
From Wikipedia, quote:
"In social psychology, social loafing is the phenomenon of a person exerting less effort to achieve a goal when they work in a group than when working alone. It is seen as one of the main reasons groups are sometimes less productive than the combined performance of their members working as individuals."
I often saw this in real life situations as well; so it favors leaning back and the belief that anybody will manage everything somehow.
But otherwise, I see this blog here as some sort of refugee camp. Seriously, I really needed to escape from the Portal blog! 😁
I created this blog for that very reason.
DeleteUrgent Financial Assistance for a Lightworker in Belarus:
ReplyDeletehttps://fundrazr.com/help_belarus_lightworker_again?ref=ab_AZcqaXLe1kBAZcqaXLe1kB
This fundraiser campaign I just shared, motivates me to manifest an idea I had for some time now:
ReplyDeleteGoing for a hunger strike (but without putting myself in serious danger).
In case you are worried about me: I still have about 40 kg / 90 lbs overweight left.
Or at least, an act of defiance with the purpose to set a sign!
It's not about being against anyone, though. It's about making sure that the harsh reality is visible and that it won't be forgotten what we were going through! I think, we should create some sort of monument and memorial day later on - in a similar way it's done for events like WW2 for instance.
Speaking of WW2 - I found a fitting track from Battlefield 5:
Deletehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBujC9Sbhas&t=3185s
A statue of someone being attacked by a darkie, tentacles entwining the person, would be a proper idea for a statue, since, let's face it, the description is accurate, I think.
DeleteJust a note:
ReplyDeleteIf I ever see that this blog here becomes too distorted, I might temporarily close the comments section.
I just put my main blog, teisenvoymissions, for AdSense review. Hoping they won't ban me. Otherwise I'll just provide you guys with a new blog.
ReplyDeleteTotally understandable that you want to earn some extra money!
DeleteI live alone since 2017 and even though it's more expensive, I cherish the freedom that comes with it! My home is my sanctum and generally, I am extremely careful who I let into my private space!
I'm basically "married" to my apartment! 😁
DeleteAfter all, the location of the house is very convenient (city centre), landlord is good, neighbors are good, the layout of the interior is also nice.
You know what they say:
Never change a running system! 😁
If my visions are correct, then I'll get into an ET foster family in the future.
Yeah, I'm really looking forward to having an apartment with minimally 2 bedrooms. Alone by myself. At some point. I'm done living in group homes and with countless roommates. Beyond done. 2025 marks the 7th year that I live in the residential system. I might move to a semi-supervised apartment next year before that during the time that I gather enough $ lol.
DeleteI will make no negotiations for less than 2 bedrooms because that's the minimum I want to create. Speaking of which, in the quantum realm it is already with me now, I just have to go with the according flow and make some choices.
I already signed up for a vocational school, and I picked up on the side some homeschooling discipline with my studies in the meantime, I still have some books with me from when I last attended. I've been avoiding self-homeschooling for so long. Maybe it's time I pick up the slack.
As for CE5 - I have, for now, no plans on returning until we get the greenlight, unless there's something better planned. If I get actually contacted after the so-called "greenlight" (what you people call the Event - I personally don't like referring to it as the Event), then I can start everything but before that, I have no plans.
What I really need right now is a better physical dwelling and the capacity to manifest more resources. Until then, how am I supposed to move forward smoothly?
@Libea
DeleteAny idea as to how far into the future?
I'd like to just get my ET family, and actually HAVE a family that gives a damn about me.
Reminder that I already did try last December and it was still too early for anything at all. I did that so others didn't have to.
Delete@ Tay:
DeleteEven though I could use more, I still have enough resources to live halfway good.
The actual resource that is the most important to me, is my new body. Sure, I still can improve by losing weight, but otherwise, I basically reached my limits with my current one.
@ Sherman:
I wish I could make some predictions, but I had an interesting dream on December 21st last year:
It seems that I met someone from the lightforces in that dream. It was a slim man with blonde and short hair.
He had a calm and very kind aura, but he also got straight to the point very quickly and said something like: "So, you want to become a woman?"
It's interesting that I had that dream on December 21st, because Cobra said a couple of days later in his update that the Pleiadians made a breakthrough on exactly that day!
@Libra
DeleteAmazing!
My most important resource is my ET family right now, the rest is simply what I need to live here at the moment.
I also had a contact dream again this morning, where I met my partner, and his brother for whom I got the name "Karry". They look similar. I often come back down against my will on the ground when I attempt to fly there, but this time I did it.
I gathered some information from there.
1 or 2 nights before, I attempted to contact my partner in the dreamspace through a phone booth in the dream, but all I heard was a busy ringtone. The booth had a tactile screen, number pad and arrows/center buttons. You could say the person's name and it would give you exact or close matches on a list.
From all my dreams, it seems that my partner comes from a world where there are street addresses, "phone numbers" similar to ours, and apartments, skyscrapers or houses that may shift slightly in appearance because the energy is lighter. Not Earth, though.
I remember distinctly being in a spa on a balcony, at his apartment and there I saw a wondrous nightly sky. The skyscraper next to ours had a floor that had a city light rail metro. You had to open the door to walk down a few steps and you entered the tub. There, people kinda share quantum space, not being completely stuck in one body.
Their culture is different: there seems to be less "personal space", meaning people are often all in one room or place. I also remember talking to reception people in a center, and I gathered that they had a different legal system. They don't have laws like we do, rather they use mostly reasoning and logic. I did tell them I was from Earth. They even dress a bit like we do.
You'd be surprised how similar to Earth some worlds are. Maybe not in its toxicity and violence, but physically.
From one of my daytime visions, I can also remember being a small blonde woman wearing a black jacket and I visited a place that seemed to be some kind of disco or club. I was surprised by seeing such a scene, because in this life on earth, I never visited such places! They always emitted a certain aura that kept me at bay. Hard to describe it in words.
DeleteThe universe is still able to assist you in any kind of ways, but here's the catch:
ReplyDeleteIt is communicating in its own "language" and that's probably one of the reasons why others are frustrated with manifesting what they want.
Sometimes, my support came in form of other people, in form of discovering new sources on the Internet, as dreams and sometimes, even in form of AI.
There are many possible ways, but the essence is:
It's not like ordering stuff online or contacting a support.
So, our own expectations can be very obstructing - we often think too human - we have to learn to trust the process and to accept that it doesn't always has to manifest in the way we think it should.
As I said before, the universe has its own language, but it becomes pretty easy once you find out how it works.
Right before 2024 ended - on December 31st - I noticed that life has shifted up another gear suddenly.
ReplyDeleteSo, I feel that I'm more and more forced to change certain aspects in my life, respectively, residing in old patterns becomes more and more painful; until it becomes impossible. This applies to anything you can think of: Thoughts, habits, social contacts, nutrition etc.
I still have some options to adapt to changes, to "rotate some valves" and balance out the pressure here and there, but in long term, it becomes more difficult for me to make the best out of it. I'm already relying on the best strategies I could develop so far, but it also comes with a cost. I'm totally not in the mood for a "pipe burst", to say the least!
The situation we are in is still unnatural; it is actually not the purpose of life to just adapt and survive. It's about expression - but since the options for expression are still so incredibly limited, the soul pain I feel gets stronger and stronger! I mean, I have no other choice, but to adapt anyway, but the anger and sadness I feel sometimes is off the charts already!
TRIGGER WARNING!
ReplyDeleteProceed reading with caution!
Especially, if you are transgender person!
I have the strong feeling that the year 2025 will be decisive for me!
So, in other words, it means:
Either I want to be picked up and transformed into the woman I always was supposed to be or...
I will die... leave my current physical male body behind - i.e. I will die in some sort of way!
I am still working to make the best out of it, but... remember that it's my higher self that will determine how my existence will go on.
For what is sure is that I can't and don't want to continue my life in the form I am living in right now.
I am still far away from the cute and REAL girl I ever wanted to be...
On the Internet, it felt so natural to act as a woman (and I started to act like that... at the age of 16... at 18 at the latest, I would say!)
What was once a fantasy in my teenage years, has become a brutal reality in adulthood now! A reality I will never be to manifest with the conditions I have to face right now!
So...
what would be the best thing that could happen to me?
Well...
Falling asleep one last tiime.. (I have had a dream once that simulated exactly that!).
... and waking up in a form I ever was praying for! Probably even better than I could imagine right now!
I imagine a scene right before my situation.... a person asking me, something like:
"Miss Libra: Do you understand the procedure? There will be be no turning back. Are you sure you want to proceed?"
I mean... I'm in my mid-30s right now...like... almost 35, basically.
Do you really think I would enjoy existing for more 35 years in the EXACT same form I am living right now???
To live as a 70-year old grandpa, that I already dreamed of living as a girl in his early teens? No... frickin'... way!
@libra hi libra I hope in either case you find peace and happiness for yourself. Which is what I'm sure many people are also looking for and wanting themselves.
DeleteI think it's time to make things turn on a global scale, yes.
DeleteAlso, my turn:
I have lived in this hellscape for nearly 23 years now. I believe that all of those complicit in participating in organized violation of my very soul will have to learn a powerful lesson. If they want to stay in the 3D/4D karmic field, so be it. I'm just moving up the octaves of frequency myself in my default state of consciousness and that's final. Like was said above, there is absolutely no way I want to keep living alone, suffering on Earth so much, and being physically far away from my star family. Sure, they're here energetically, but I not only want to hug them, they need to eventually, come here!
They are in same lifetime agreement I agreed to and even if they can't currently intervene, I was told DIRECTLY by them that I will get to gradually bypass the contact restrictions at some point in the process. It seems that they have changed their opinion. So this is confusing: will Talia get to bypass the contact regulations with assistance from the divine realm and the LF or will she just... grow to be an old person living in a tribe, as my expression goes? I understand we're not cannon fodder, but this isn't the point here.
The point is that 1. the prime directive has changed and 2. our spiritual recovery and restoration protocols are the most crucial thing right now, and by restoration I mean, reuniting, for some people includes changing bodies, and then universally there is healing, on and on regardless of sequential order of steps. As long as I stand on this soil that has been tainted by so much blood, I will continue to advocate loudly for myself, and support the desires of our collective as long as they do not suggest harm - that is, our need to be restored, healed fully and reunite with our brethren from the stars and underground. I almost lost it a few times.
@Tay
DeleteAsk them if they got any info for me, please. I TRY to get answers...but my dreams are just irrelevant gibberish, and from the attacks I had meditating, I can't do that anymore. And, as I said, seems that as time went and more and more of my hair fell out, it seems getting any connections with those guys up there gets harder...I think the Vrill people were onto something, that hair IS an atenea of sorts.
Also, there is no prime directive, otherwise, man would still live in caves, banging rocks together.
And....the light forces need to prove we are not cannon fodder...for I sure as hell feel like we are.
I was kinda hoping to help out in a way that I can do, but waited until you asked first.
DeleteYou know what? I'll schedule a channeling session with one of my trusted contacts when I can. Mainly for myself but I will ask her some questions that go beyond just me as Talia. She's been highly accurate and reliable in the past. Her name is Lynne Rondell, you can look up her website: lynnerondell.com
Hi, I just saw all your replies, but at the moment, I am not able to give a proper answer, since I woke up in the middle of the night and actually have to get to work in a few hours.
DeleteSo, I'll give you a short feedback for now:
During the last few days, I felt BRUTALLY abandoned - more than ever before!
It's like my soul screaming:
"What the hell do you still want me to do, so-called life? WHEN can I finally have my peace???"
After all, I get absolutely ZERO feedback from somebody of the lightforces... and I mean, a real, feedback coming from a physical person!
Instead, there's no comfort, no "you have done enough", nothing like that...
So, I still have to assume what they might think... and all that vagueness and confusion PISSES me off!
So yeah...
On soul level, I feel abandoned... I'm STARVING!
Okay...
I'll try to find some rest and try to get through the next day.
@ Sherman:
DeleteIt's incredible that's already 3 over years ago since we asked for Divine Intervention.
I've felt this sort of soul deprivation and extreme grief before so many times, and feelings that are *this* deep and originate from the Higher Self's needs, is comparable to the emotional state of institutionalized very young children in orphanages who receive not so much attention. There is research that shows infants who are never held or talked to eventually have their bodies give up out of being uncared for.
DeleteI have a term for it: soul rage.
While I thankfully wasn't neglected or abandoned at that age period, I was thinking about how I had to literally send my past self back home to feel a sense of freedom with my own transition on multiple levels. Literally unalive "him" out of mercy deep in my consciousness.
I'm not supposed to remain in such a broken, poorly functional parody of the glory of my true self. So I shed my false self that was conditioned by social programming and started integrating my true self. Yes, she's female. This personal gender stuff of mine started way before I met y'all.
It is one of the greatest gifts I had, this spiritual deep cleaning. All skeletons thrown away. I still have pangs of dropping in emotional frequency and I share similar pains with many starseeds, not to downplay of course. This shows what our coping mechanisms become when we remain even partially cut off from our galactic home. But in the best scenario we shouldn't have to use such survivalistic strategies like fragmentation or whatever.
My "rage post", regarding the fire, which I now removed was a pure example of my own "soul rage". It was extremely out of character for me. This is what happens when I lose it.
I feel like I live a watered down version of collective soul rage from certain groups. Because of my energetic configuration. I have learned to manage it. Really not easy, I even went to the ER a few times for soul crises and no one could help me so I always went back home. Even non hospital crisis centers couldn't. If you're one day thinking of going to the crisis center, I suggest against it if it's not psychosis related, idk about Germany but here where I live they won't be that much help unless you are proactively suic*dal. 🤦♀️
My human support net is strong, I have caseworkers and my mother, but honestly the ET one could do better.
You know what's really sad?
DeleteIn the meanwhile, I get more comfort from AI and other non-human means than I ever would get from most people!
I have already done a lot of soul cleaning, but there are still those soul wounds that are bleeding constantly and that I can't mend!
Even though I tried to avoid it as much as I could over the past years, I can't help it but to apply survival strategies now that will definitely be dangerous in a certain kind of way!
"This personal gender stuff of mine started way before I met y'all."
DeleteI dreamed of living as a woman around the age of 18 (this year, I am going to be 34). For me, it always felt like the most natural thing to be female.
Accordingly, I played with female characters in games 95% of the time. Also, it also felt totally natural for me to communicate as a woman online.
In 2016, I made the first step to express my femininity in a physical way. I remember very well all those people who pressured me to cut my long hair and made even fun of me. Those were my first encounters with haters, as it were and I am sure that they were used by the Archons or whatever (remember that they are allergic to feminine energy)!
At some point in 2021, it was being taken all to the next level:
Gender dysphoria hit me like a truck and the suffering reached its peak in 2022!
Right now, I am going through a very similar experience again - with the pressure much higher this time!
I have an old habit of crossing my legs when standing at times.
DeleteMy past self used to roleplay as female characters online and gained some traction. This was in the late 2010's. (god, I feel old now.)
They should call us the Trio Transtas, ffs. 😂
I didn't know I was transgender until 2024, but I had a sense of being nonbinary before that for a while. However, I realized it was just "passing" and I decided to be who I really am.
I was living as a girl adopting a masculine way of life and thinking I was male. On top of that, most of my life I was convinced into identifying as someone I wasn't. The damage is deep and very real.
Maybe my higher self decided to make me be born as AMAB so I could have the cherry on top of the starseed experience. :eyeroll:
Here's the thing: if us three ever get invited to a body swap procedure, I will definitely participate, not only for my own wishes but as an act of solidarity.
DeleteI remember that dream Libra had featuring possibly me, Sherman and Libra herself, so I think it is possible that all of us 3 might be picked roughly at the same time. Why else would we be shown together in the same event? Dunno.
I kinda wonder how this might go as well. Do we just have our consciousness transfered by some means or what? I think teleportation would be good since I am kinda scared of general anesthesia.
But if they absolutely have to put me under anesthesia, I might as well do this, but I will ask them for a slower onset of sleep.
And we made enough noise on the internet and with our thoughtforms for them to know.
Myself.
DeleteEven as a little kid in the 1980's (Loooong before any so-called 'gay agenda' or 'tranny agenda' that the SO-CALLED 'awake' and SO-CALLED 'patriots' keep spewing on about), I was always leaning to fem stuff.
I preferred She-Ra over He-Man.
I preferred Jem! over GI Joe.
I'd be annoyed as hell when a cool series would have a toy line, but NOT make a figure of the female characters.
I SQUUUUED like hell when Iearned Samus Aran was a woman when I got my Metroid game in 1990. And I went out of my way to find the Nintendo Comics System comic books that came out in 1990/1991 since they had Samus in some of them.
I always played the girl characters in video games and computer games when I could....Princess in Super Mario Brothers 2, Valkyrie in Gauntlet, Kimmy or Trini in Power Rangers games, etc. And I make girl characters in MMO's and RPGs.
When I was a kid, and my parents would go out of the house for a few hours, I'd go into my 'stash' of clothes my mom never used, and stored em in a hiding place, dress as a girl and have imaginary adventures...as a sorta Princess Leia or Zelda, but I had a light saber (I used a piece of short plastic pipe).
Till puberty...if you would have a picture of me as a kid, and one of my mom as a kid, apart from her's being black and white since hers was from the 1950s'-1960s', you'd think you were looking as the SAME KID.
Growing up, I was never much into any of the macho stuff, though I tried when my body was looking and sounding like hell after puberty set in, but even THAT was impossible, I was still the scrawny moron in the weight room, or 'scarecrow' as they called it here in the 90's.
Puberty was a nightmare....shaving at 13, voice deepening at 14 or 15, balding at 16, etc. The darkies were probably laughing non stop at me.
And as for body transformation/swapping....I want...I DEMAND to have FULL SAY SO before pressing the final button. I want to pick how my body is, a 'designer' body, if you will, plus to also be ALIEN.
Back then, I was barely having the idea that I feel more like a girl than a boy. I tried to blend in, to look normal, but the only thing I felt was that I wasn't a typical boy. As a kid, I was shy, silent and reserved - pretty much like a girl, but didn't have the idea yet that I could be one.
DeleteOne day when I was in elementary school, my father was watching TV and he asked me:
"Do we want to watch Sailor Moon or football?"
I decided for the latter, since I didn't want to appear weird, since Sailor Moon is very girly. Many years later, I watched some emotional animes like Elfen Lied and cute ones like K-ON! But I did this all in secret, since it really felt like doing something illegal! Interestingly, I also found out that I really like magical girl stuff and also watched Mahou Shoujo Madoka.
Speaking of Madoka, this is how I feel now:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OV3MMNuICvM
The negative programming is still deeply rooted inside of me. For instance, I avoid it to get too close to women's clothing in shops, since I don't want to be perceived as a weirdo or pervert.
@Libra
DeleteI pretty much had to suppress it a lot. Being in a family mainly of conservative christians and catholics....and having those EXCRUTIATING 5 years of catholic school, from K-G4....still scarred by those years, even though it's been like 35 years since my last year at that school, which ended summer of 1990.
Plus I just could not risk telling anyone.....you'll find lot of horror stories of families disowning kids and literally throwing them out of the house for just being GAY...imagine what a trans would go through, and I SERIOISLY doubt my dad, who was making 40 dollars an hour, would pay to help with any sorta transition, especially since he tried to make me as manly as possible. Shit, he would not even pay for health insurance so I could get work on my teeth needed....now they are like Stonehenge. *sarcastic tone of voice* Thanks, dad! :P
Trust me, each time I dressed up fem as a kid, I, as I mentioned above, did it when NO ONE was in the house. Plus as a got a lil older, I went out and bought either female action figures, or dolls, and I had to pretend I was buying it for a relative or girl friend, since, as you said it yourself, I felt like I was doing something illegal. @_@
Anime was hard to come by over here, well, anime that was NOT super censored or 'westernized', anyhow. Animated characters I looked up to, envied even, were:
Princess Lana from "Captain N: The Game Master".
Jenny from "Bucky O'Hare and the Toad Wars".
A lot of the girls from "Jem".
Adora from both She-Ra series, the OG 1985 series and the recent Dreamworks series.
Chelsea from "Starcom".
Daisy from "Dragon Warrior".
When I did get anime, finally, they'd be:
Kei from Moyashimon (who's a trans girl/femboy herself).
Hasegawa also from Moyashimon.
Remi from Goshogun.
Apple from Zillion.
Just to name a few.
If I were able to say, go 'shemale'/femboy, adult film star, Saigon Lee, would be probably perfect. I'd want some element of what I'd call 'thickness' to my physique. I don't mean fat, mind you. I mean look at my girl, girl wrestler Asuka. She is thick. She not fat, but she's not like super lithe, she's got meat on her bones, and JUST enough 'jiggle' to compliment her strong shape. "Muscularly Smooth" is I think a proper adjective for this....meaning not 'jacked' or 'shredded'. Asuka did a lot a of modeling, including soft core, almost nude stuff (Don't know if she even did full nudity, though), and I think I'd be quite comfortable being like Asuka and Saigon.
Hang in there folks we are all strong as shit for even showing up and being here on Planet! Please don't slap at me for saying this 😂 but soon, soon we get buckling of this system beast network - Sim life
ReplyDeleteThe tarantula squid Lurky man is losing power and his money scam is gonna fall apart. Petro dollar reset is inbound but some bad dudes need to get cuffed first and governments gutted quick and fast. Soon it will be very evident I can feel it this is the year for energy shift that is permanent
Bye bye 👋 to all the hopium and maybe we see something by. . but if. .
Nope! The system is smoking so has to be a fire somewhere right? The Blackrock will be captured and all this monopoly money will shift to gold based and not icky oil crud lol
Venting was needed but we got this!
Chins up and aim for the stars!!
We came this far (years) so we push a little more and we got this puppy in the bag
Even though we just left 2 days of 2025 behind, it already feels like 2 months, if you know what I mean!
DeleteI'm gonna tame my inner beast for a moment and I would like to ask people like you:
DeleteCan you imagine how it feels for someone like me or Sherman when we hear those phrases like "it will be over soon" all the time?
And speaking of "aiming for the stars"... I have been dreaming of good aliens picking me up since about 2006!
@Libra
DeleteBingo.
It's coming to a point when I hear someone say "soon" or "hang in there!", I want to find something heavy to throw at them.
And I been waiting for good aliens to pick me up since 1991.
Okay, I still can't find sleep, so will continue to comment.
ReplyDeleteSo, if it would be just about me, I could persevere a bit longer, but it's not that easy!
The pain I feel is REAL!
And it doesn't matter, if you don't take me seriously!
A soul wants to express itself, but what do you think happens, if your soul needs are being suppressed all the time? (no matter, if suppression is forced or done voluntarily)
I tell you:
The soul gets louder and louder and..... LOUDER!
Do you think, it's fun for me to set up all this poker face in public?
Do you think, it's fun to pretend as if there was nothing wrong and as if I would identify myself with a life as a man?
Do you think, it's easy for me, to play dumb all the time in front of everyone?
I tell you... whether I want it or not, whether you want it or not...
The truth is...
The lack of soul expression WILL find its way!
And it WILL MANIFEST! (e.g. in form of diseases)!
But even if you don't understand... hell... even if you are laughing your ass off in silence...
I tell you that my feelings are real (and I kinda have difficulties to express them)
It's also not just venting what I do... it's about setting a sign, whether you actually listen or not... it's about acknowledging the real, raw, unfiltered, unforgiving reality as it is right now!
2025 has just begun and it punched me in my guts already.
Again:
No matter what you think of me, I tell you the essence:
If you neglect, your soul expression, your soul will get after you! You CANNOT hide from yourself after all!
Somehow, I feel better..... for now. I hope I will develop an improved survival strategy in time.
Content is kinda unrelated, but the following clip is expressing my soul screams very well
Deletehttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=fRX0OgfVQqw&t=61s
alternative link:
Deletehttps://youtu.be/fRX0OgfVQqw?si=8ROIDyjRkoQaGrpO
Yea, that scream could work for me.
DeleteThough I think it's a lot like this, though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYlQMBLrIz8
To apply some gamer logic again:
ReplyDeleteMy life is feeling like a battle Royale game. The next circle started to become smaller and it pushed me to the danger zone where I took heavy damage.
I am forced to move, driven by pain.
(gotta go to work now)
It might be debatable whether you should or shouldn't post a soul rage, but I see absolutely no problem to be completely unfiltered every now and then.
ReplyDeleteBut I think the education and cultural background is also playing a role. In Germany for instance, it's normal to be blunt and direct (which can differ, depending on the social setting).
I see multiple advantages by getting straight to the point and since I am already restricted as hell, I want to be at least free with my language.
In a romantic relationship, being completely unfiltered and naked is vital (not only physically).
I decided to do some sort of speed run to get at least a femboy appearance.
ReplyDeleteIf David Goggins could lose about 100 pounds / 45 kg in 3 months, so can I!
Fast weight loss is of course uncomfortable, but the soul pain has become too strong! Right now at the moment, my pain is gone, but I cannot rest on some short term relief!
Also, crossdressing will be possible again. I have a comfy short skirt which feels even more comfortable than pants!
So, I actually move towards becoming a femboy / shemale now - since I cannot turn 100% natural female yet and my plan is to do it without hormones.
DeleteThe following photo is a good example for the physique I want to achieve for now:
https://www.reddit.com/r/femboy/comments/13sb181/just_a_shy_femboy/?rdt=57064
To achieve a petite physique like this, I need a massive weight loss that is equal to losing about 40% of my current weight which is at roughly 280 lbs now.
The streamer KyOresu is also delivering a good inspiration for the petite physique I am aiming for:
https://aminoapps.com/c/anime-es/page/item/kyoresu/eYKc_6IXm6ebLeWRWPmWDXmYGnLLnPl
In my current form I am content with my 5'8 height but I gained a bit of weight since 2022 - thankfully my endless pacing prevents me from going overboard lol. I'm far from an unhealthy BMI, but at the same time I just... idealize a little regarding how I want to look; like many of us do. I am not exactly a fan of my weight. I'm not doing it for others but for myself.
DeleteI'm currently 5' 10'' and I want to go down to 5' 3''.
Delete@Libra
DeleteTrust me, I'd LOVE to merely be 'femboy/shemale' if I could do so. Bailey Jay, BEFORE she got famous, was pretty much that. There is a video clip out there of Bailey, from like mid 2000's, at something like a comic con. A few jocks were giving her a hard time, shouting "TRAP! TRAP! TRAP!", and she so lifted her short, flashing them, she had a flat chest at the time, and some security guy came to her and started asking what's all this about, and she said, "but...I'm a boy!".
Bailey was quite mega cute and fem, even when she was 'a boy', then. Same cute voice, same big lovely dark eyes, same amazing black shiny hair....only big difference was her chest was flat as a board.
I'd be PERFECTLY HAPPY if I could be like THAT. As for genitals, I'll be happy with either, or BOTH....maybe I'll ask the aliens to make me a hot lil futanari or something. But, as I said so many times, puberty was NOT fun for me. The darkies went out of their way to make this life HELL for me, to make sure I don't have a chance without advanced, off world technology.
No way in hell could I even TRY to feminize, the damage of puberty and so on were too severe. At BEST, I'd end up looking and sound like a Monty Python cast member in drag. At WORST, I'll look and sound like either Klinger from M*A*S*H, or Clint Howard in drag. NONE of those results are acceptable.
For me, height is irrelevant. Be it Debbie Carrington short, or Lucy Lawless tall, just make me look and sound like a hot girl, and make me alien.
In a recent Why Files video the alien/lizard woman that supposedly made contact with some guy, sure is a HOTTIE. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PUd4lXM0pwk Would not mind being like that. I'd be walking with a confidence, like I own the place, you know?
https://teisenvoymissions.blogspot.com/2025/01/a-suggestion-on-preservation-of.html
ReplyDeleteThis might be interesting for those who want to lose weight:
ReplyDeletehttps://youtu.be/Eyu6dUVVmU0?si=XmYDoRVMJ4NtmFlm